Doctors Tips To Avoid Last Minute Wedding Stress

Dr Ravi Lukha, Medical Director at Bupa UK Insurance, advises on how to combat wedding stress! 

Peak wedding season is upon us, and the UK’s Google search habits show huge leaps in people seeking quick turnaround weddings - and planners to help make those nuptials happen.

According to Google Search Console analysis, UK volumes for searches around quick weddings have seen significant increases, recently. In the last six months, the following searches have seen steep climbs:

· ‘planning a wedding in 3 months’ searches increased 7-fold

· ‘marriage planner’ searches quadrupled

· ‘wedding planning help’ searches tripled

As any big day gets closer, it’s completely natural for nerves and stress to kick in. However, if you’ve given yourself a short run-up to your wedding day, you might be feeling extra stressed! Planning a wedding in three months can have many advantages, but naturally you might also face some challenges.

When you’re stressed, it can take its toll on your mental and physical health, and even your relationships. For any couples going through that stress right now, or are newly engaged and considering getting married sooner rather than later, Dr Ravi Lukha, Medical Director for Bupa UK Insurance, shares advice to help ease wedding anxiety.

The ways stress can affect your body

A bit of stress can be good for you, and a deadline like a wedding day can be a great motivator to complete your to-do list. However, feeling too much stress consistently can overwhelm your nervous system, and impact your physical and mental health, along with your relationships.

Physical signs of stress can include:

· Constant exhaustion

· Trouble sleeping

· Muscles tiredness, soreness and pain

· Stomach discomfort

· Headaches

· Grinding your teeth, or clenching your jaw

· Disinterest in sex

· A feeling of tightness in your chest

· If you have periods, they may become disrupted

Mental effects of stress:

· Constantly feeling worried

· Having trouble controlling your temper

· Finding everyday life more overwhelming than you would usually

· Struggling to switch off and enjoy things

· Feelings of depression and anxiety

These physical and mental effects can impact how you behave, and interact with others:

· You might feel like you can’t make decisions

· Concentrating is more difficult than usual

· You socially withdraw

· You rely on food for control – either eating more or less than usual

· You might lean on alcohol or cigarettes to cope with your feelings

· You might have aggressive or tearful outbursts

· You may pick at your skin or nails

Tips to help cope with wedding build-up stress

1. Make time to share how you’re feeling

Coordinating so much in such a short period can be overwhelming, so it’s really important to share what you’re going through with others (particularly your other half). If you’ve spotted physical, mental or behavioural changes in yourself, sharing what you’re going through with others can help you understand how you’re feeling, and why your body may be reacting in certain ways.

If you’re not used to sharing your feelings with others, starting may feel daunting, but here are three things that can help:

- Take a moment to stop, and ask yourself what you’re noticing, feeling or thinking. This can help you identify the specific emotions and feelings you’re having. Giving a name to these sensations can help you learn how to cope with them.

- Practice what you want to say. Writing down what you’d like to share with someone can help you decide how you want to express yourself, and the level of detail you want to give. You could use your written notes to practice from before sharing aloud with others.

- Speak to someone helpful. This means picking the right moment (where it’s a calm and private atmosphere), with a person who’s a good listener, open and

empathetic. This person could be a friend, family member, someone from a mental health charity, like Samaritans, or a health professional.

2. Don’t forget to unwind

Finding ways that genuinely help you to switch off and make time for yourself can help keep you relaxed and healthy. You might not feel like you have much time to relax when you’re planning your wedding, however just five minutes can make a big difference.

- Breathing exercises: This is one of the simplest ways to calm your body and mind, anytime and anywhere. Try a guided breathing exercise if you’re new to the idea.

- Use muscle relaxation techniques: Stretching, yoga and a relaxing bath can all help you to release muscle tension that can build when we’re feeling stressed.

- Get creative: Crafty hobbies, like colouring, painting, drawing, knitting and stitching, are also great ways to help your mind switch off. Try and avoid wedding-based crafts for ultimate relaxation!

- Try mindfulness: Learning to be present in the moment can help reduce your stress. Gentle mindfulness nudges can help make a big difference to your wellbeing. Try our month of mindfulness calendar to see how it makes you feel.

3. Let some tasks go, where you can

Wanting everything to be perfect for your wedding day is completely understandable. Taking ownership of each task may feel like the best way to achieve your vision, but realistically, you may be taking on more than you can reasonably handle.

It can feel really difficult to let go of tasks – and the control that comes with them. However, you may be surprised how willing friends and family are to get involved and help – and how special it is to be asked to help. Start with smaller tasks to help free up your time. You may even be able to spend more quality time with your partner if you let go of the smaller tasks.

4. Be mindful of your social media use

Social media can be a great way to communicate with your guests in the run up to your wedding, along with being a great source of inspiration. However, it can also make it easy to compare yourself to others and feel pressure to push yourself in ways you weren’t originally planning to. Once something is booked, cross it off your list, give your finger scrolling a rest and save your energy.

Remember that each wedding is different in its own way. Reflecting on what’s important to you and your partner is the most important thing – not replicating what you see on social media.

5. Don’t punish yourself for taking time away from planning

Planning a wedding can feel all-consuming, but it’s important to have a cut-off point. You may find it useful to think of wedding planning like your job – have set times that you work on your wedding so you can still dedicate time to your work and leisure.

Time blocking and scheduling in your wedding tasks may help you to become more efficient at achieving what you want in that time, increasing your sense of accomplishment and reducing feelings of overwhelm.

6. Remember there’s no shame in seeking help

We all know wedding planning can be fun, but it can also be extremely stressful. If you’re finding it difficult to unwind or open up to others, remember that there are channels that can help you. From free online resources to sharing how you feel with a health professional, it’s better to address what you’re feeling at an earlier stage. Without helpful coping mechanisms, unhealthy outlets may become habit. Getting married is all about feeling your best – so it’s better to do what you can to manage stress in the runup to make the most of your celebrations.